Dating Tips: Keeping the Girl

When I started to get good, and could escalate quickly with any girl, I remember those girls I slept with but couldn’t keep around.

And it’s quite sad.

There are lots of women that has the potential to become a great girlfriend.

But I had my head higher than my ass.

…maybe that’s a little harsh.

But this comes down from TWO distinct problems:

First, I was trying to prove something to myself. I was still a recovering nerd. And I’ve never fully recovered. But I’ve stopped trying to recover. And that’s what’s made me move past this “proving myself” thing.

I just accepted who I am.

Sure, I like video games and comic books.

But…

Do you think women have cooler interests?

Is getting drunk, Myspace and shopping is cooler than what I’m into?

It’s all relative.
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Managing Your Time when Meeting Women

Dating can be your best friend.

…OR your worst adversary.

Most of the time, a man can feel like a slave to his natural need to procreate.

Then there’s that common phrase,  “He thinks with his… You know.”

Well it is hard NOT think that way if you are physically unsatisfied.

But men are also goal oriented.

We are doers, and need to achieve things and affect the world in a positive way.

One of the biggest challenges I’ve personally faced is balancing the two – my urges and

achieving my goals.

When you are single, dating can consume a lot of time. Women will suck away at your time if you don’t know what you’re doing.
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Dating Tips for Men: The Attraction Code

http://www.vindicarlo.com -Vin DiCarlo has just released a new book, the Attraction Code.

You can get a free 45-Audio TeleClass introduction to The Attraction Code by visiting http://www.vindicarlo.com.

Dating Tips for Men, Dating Tips for Guys.

Published in: on July 15, 2008 at 7:58 pm  Leave a Comment  
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Pickup Artist Phone Game: NoFlakes System

http://www.vindicarlo.com/noflakesdvd

“If YOU Want To Eliminate All The Disappointment That Can Come From Unanswered Calls and Having Women Flake Out on You, Then go to NoFlakesDVD.com”

Published in: on July 14, 2008 at 5:21 pm  Leave a Comment  
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The Pick-Up Artist Game in Attracting “10”

Are you interested in meeting, attracting and keeping a “10” kind of a woman? If yes, then you will find the letter very interesting.

But before anything else, let’s go waaaay back…

Back in high school, I had a girl classmate that was so perfect.

That girl was so beautiful, cool and smart that it was hard to look at her (and yet I can’t take my eyes off away from her)…

She was friendly to everyone and was one of the popular kids in school.

We talked occasionally, and looking back I realize we were flirting (I was too stupid to realize at the time).

I was really wanted to ask her to senior prom… but at the last minute I chickened out.

It was a few years later that I realized that the girl had a crushed on me all the senior year.

I’ve talked to a lot of guys and this seems a pretty common experience among them there was this ONE SPECIAL WOMAN who you crushed on from afar, and they missed an opportunity with her, or she broke your heart…

Ah, the hard to tame “10,” a perfect girl that every guy dream of but never seems to have it.

I have so many things to say about this so-called “10’s.” In one word they are women of another “breed,” but at the same time, what makes them so is in the way they think.

To help you resolve this conundrum, and maybe help you find that “perfect girl” for yourself, you need to understand you own fascination with female perfection, and understand the reality behind extremely beautiful women.

First thing, the idea about “10” is just a myth. There’s no such thing as a perfect human being. You cannot tell that a girl is more “valuable” just because she looks beautiful than the other girl.

A woman that turns you on and have a great chemistry with you is the only true “10” and is the one that’s perfect for you.

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Part II of Storytelling: Putting It On Action

This is now the “Part II” of the storytelling newsletter.

In “Part I” we covered about the importance of storytelling and how it can improve your game dramatically. Now we are going to start using storytelling and from that we will understand why it is so powerful.

We are going to work on constructing your very own epics!

In “Part I” there were two things I’ve asked of you.

The first one is to create a list of 7-10 moments in your life that have changed and defined who you are, and the other was to write down 5 things about your identity that you want people to know about you.

We are going to start out working with these things.

First lets take out the 7-10 story ideas and cut them down to 5 solid ideas,  eliminate the ones that you think may not seem to interesting to other people or ones that were “you kind of had to be there” stories.

Reflect on that 5 stories and see if which ones have the most emotional connection to you. From that, consider which of the stories would most interested in sharing with other people and which ones do you think could captivate and relate to your audience.

Now that you’re down with 5 solid ideas, we are going to just focus on constructing 3 solid stories so you can go out and start using them immediately.

For now, your main target with these stories is women, so focus on which ones you think a woman is more interested in hearing. (Any women can become interested in any story if delivered properly, but if you have a good story about you watching dirty videos and eating pizza, it may be better left for the guys)

Also feel free to ask your friends about which story subjects they would be more interested in hearing to help narrow it down to 3 solid concepts.

And of course I’m sure there were still some of you out there that were to modest to come up with 10 ideas and only got around three, so I guess that makes your job easier.

As I said in “Part I” I’d do this exercise along with you, however, critiquing all 3 of my stories will take too long so we are just going to use one of my story concepts and build it from the ground up through the techniques I show you.

Now I am going to try to discard all the information on storytelling that I know and jot this story down from scratch (This actually happened to me the other day, so I figure this is a prime example)
“The other day I was at club voodoo with my friends and I roam around making some new friends and having a good time. Well there’s one guy somehow works his way into my group but then ends up not leaving us alone all night, and he was really an annoying person that you just don’t want to talk to. He kept making every interaction in the club awkward and would not leave until he actually gets a hint that we don’t like his presence.”

Pretty annoying story… I know, but we can turn this to something awesome.

First we need to understand the 3 components of a good story.

The first component, is “The Hook Question”

The object of the hook question is to make sure everyone in the group you are telling the story gets involved. It is  use to captivate the group and it is the line you deliver to introduce your story.
When using the hook question make sure you have the attention of EVERYONE in the group before you start with the introduction of the story, because if there’s one person not paying attention and they tune in halfway through your story, they are going to have no idea what is going and potentially pull the entire group away from your story.

Make eye contact or at least a nod from every member of the group before beginning your story.

There are two different types of hook questions.

An open ended hook question and a yes or no hook question.

Basing on my story here is the possible hook question:

An open ended hook question would be “How do you deal with people who you just want to leave you alone?”

A possible yes or no hook question would be “Have you ever been to club voodoo?”

Of the two hook I feel open ended hook question are better because it gets your audience more involved with the story you are about to tell, although a yes or no one is good also cause it gets you right into the story.

So let’s add this to the story… (Find a hook question for your example stories as well)
For my story now, I’ll be using an open ended hook questions so to start my story in the interaction I would say

Me: “Hey guys…how do you deal with people when you just can’t get them to leave you alone?!”

Group: “blah blah”

Me: “Yeah that’s interesting so check this out…the other day I am at club voodoo…(rest of story)
Now that you have the hook question down, we are going to rewrite our stories to demonstrate aspects of identity because the next step is to demonstrate personality.

There are a number of ways of doing this but for now lets go to our list of 5 things that you want to convey in your identity. Try to fit as many into the story as you can.

My 5 things were:

I am a very social person
I am a musician
I have a high and fun energy
I have a good sense of humor
I am interested in video and photography

Now you want to try to at least fit 3 of your 5 things into the story, but if its awkward and seems out of place then just get at least 1 or 2 in. You need one though, but the very manner you deliver the story may convey a lot about yourself.

Other ways to convey personality is to act out your characters. Bring your stories into life.
Another important aspect in expressing your personality in your stories is by speeding up your voice during moments of excitement and slowing it down during more intense moments to create tension.

You should always have tension build up to excitement or your audience will have a feeling of lack of resolution but that is the last component of a story that I will get into shortly.

Speeding up, pauses, and slowing your voice down is hard for me to sow you through a newsletter, but when you recite your stories out loud you will gain a natural since of where each belongs and will improve through reactions with your audience.

So now I am going to rewrite my story as it stands to convey my personality…

Me: “Hey guys…how do you deal with people when you just caaaaannt (exaggerated can’t to show frustration with the situation and convey more personality) get them to leave you alone?!”

Group: “blah blah”

Me: “Yeah that’s interesting so check this out…the other day I am at club voodoo and I walk in with a group of my friends and random people we met on the way (social) and there is a decent amount of people in the club, we are all having a great time (fun) and meeting lots of cool new people (social).
Well this one guy somehow works his into my “group” (putting finger quotes around it) and he just has this vibe. Like he is so out of place, he was walking around with a Harley Davison Motorcycle hat on and like this tainted banana colored polo (Painting this scene gets them laughing and displays humor and some understand of social norms and fashion.)

So my friends and I keep trying to away from him but he just won’t back down, he would just follow us everywhere we went, buzzing around like a mosquito..(pause)..with a really bad taste in clothing (humor)…you would think he could get the hint when we were practically jogging away (act out slight jogging motion).

Eventually he finally goes away and we start to have a fun night again.

As you can see, the story starts to build up but it has no resolution, it just kind of ends.

The last component of story is the punch line
. A punch line is often used for humor and ties up the story. Its biggest importance is to let the audience know it’s over. It can be one line or much more… The punch line can be a small extension of the story to bring further resolution to the issue. This is where you can get creative and give some lamer stories a much cooler ending.

You need to create a dramatic build up in order to have a successful delivery of your punch line in your story, such as by slowing down your words and then once the comic relief or resolution comes, you speed the conversation back up.

The actual ending to my story involves the creepy guy going into the bathroom, some guy that was annoyed by him jokingly bumping into him while the creepy was using the urinal, and the creepy guy pissed on the front of his pants, got embarrassed and left.

Now, first off, it was kind of rude on that one guy’s part and I don’t want to associate myself with friends like that. Also…a guy pissing on himself is an odd thing to share during the initial interaction.

So I am going to do a little story morphing by combining a similar, less gross incident that happened that night.

Nothing wrong with changing up some incidents if it makes things more entertaining…after all…it’s a “STORY”

Now here’s the updated story with the new punch line:

Me: “Hey guys…how do you deal with people when you just caaaaannt get them to leave you alone?!”

Group: “blah blah”

Me: “Yeah that’s interesting so check this out…the other day I am at Club Voodoo and I walk in with a group of my friends and random people we met on the way and there is a decent amount of people in the club, we are all having a great time and meeting lots of cool new people. Well this one guy somehow works his into my “group” and he just has this vibe. Like he is so out of place, he was walking around with a Harley Davison Motorcycle hat on and like this tainted banana colored polo. So my friends and I keep trying to avoid him but he just won’t back down, he would just follow us everywhere we went, buzzing around like a mosquito…with a really bad taste in clothing…you would think he could get the hint when we were practically jogging away. Anyway…my friends and I get away from him and are on the top floor and we make a super tall pyramid out of energy drink cans. (Illustrate structure with arms). Then all of a sudden, the creepy guy weasels his way onto the floor and sits down at our table…and like a jackass he tries to add a can to the structure. (Start slowing things down for the punch line) Little did he know…that although the Red Bull on the top of the structure was opened…it was full…so this guy tries to add his can to the top then BAM!……………….the whole structure falls right into his lap and the filled soda can pours all over his crotch! It looked like he wet his pants! His face turns beat red and he just runs downstairs and we assume he left the club cause we didn’t see him again…I don’t know what the big deal is…I thought it was hilarious! (Final punch line, they know the story is over)

Now if you have done these three steps to your stories, you got some great stuff on your hands.
HOWEVER….there is still a few more sprinkles you are going to want to add to your story someday.

These things are the secret little tips of successful storytelling.

The first and most important is creating check in points.
Check in points are mini questions you throw into your story making sure that you have the full attention of the audience. It gets them more involved.

Examples are “That ever happen to you?” “Don’t you hate when that happens?” “You know what I mean?”

Just make sure they are not obvious and sounding like you are taking time out for them to go into detail about your check in point question.

Another good way to check in is to compare aspects of your story to the current situation you are in. ex. “Kind of like that over there” “Reminds me of her (point to person).”

You should at least have two check in points near the start and in the middle. If you are doing everything right, your audience will be captivated and waiting for the build up of the punch line so you won’t need one near the end.

If ever you see someone walking away or the attention’s not in you, throw one out to regain focus. An example in a passage of my story would be:

“Like he is so out of place, he was walking around with a Harley Davison Motorcycle hat on and like this tainted banana colored polo. You know when someone is clearly just lost and not sure what he or she is doing….kind of like that guy over there (point to someone similar).”

You don’t always need a full response with your check in points. A nod is perfectly okay when regaining focus of the audience.

How to Supercharge Your Conversations, and Generate Massive Attraction

Today I will be sharing with you the tips on how to be a successful story teller and how to construct a powerful story that can hold the interest of not only women but anyone in your life. These tips when used properly, can make your desirability with women sky rocket.
But before anything else, I want to clear up a few myths when it comes to the matter of story telling.

Myth 1: Does my story needs to be true and should it be about about me?.

It’s up to you whether its true or not what matter is on how you keep your conversation fun. Applying the right techniques in your story telling can keep the conversation moving.

Keeping your story fun, even if the women doesn’t believe the story you are telling, can make them entertained and most likely run with new topics that have developed from your stories.

I’m not telling you to lie though, the most powerful stories are ones that are true and come from a place of emotion. However I think the biggest misconception is not whether the stories have to be true, but is more about whether or not they have to be about the story teller.
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Things to Remember in Your Attraction with Women

One of the mistakes that some guys commits when they first meet a girl is to show that they understand the GAME. Like, they’ll  start talking about evolution, alpha males, how girls will always cheat on their boyfriends, how they know girls are more intimate guys and blah blah.

I will refer to this kind of act as nonsense as “The Talk of Death”.

As a pick-up guru this kind of things will make your conversation topics very poor with women. Especially hot ones.

It might work with the social anthropologist grad student, but to the girl that any man in his right mind would be attracted to, there are a few major things wrong with this strategy:

(BTW – if you happen to find a girl that loves this kind of stuff, by all means go on with it, I’m just saying it should not be used as an ATTRACTION techniques for most of the female population)

1. It puts her on the defensive. It’s exactly like one country revealing it’s battle plans to another country that it is at war with.
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